The Sickos discuss Joe's recent layoff, and how getting laid off is fine, and it's easy to get a new job, and there WILL be a future, and you can depend on it, and it's easy and smart to feel confident in the future, and it's all going to be so normal.
[00:00:00] Behold, A Cold Open
[00:00:02] So, like, Gooning is like a prank thing. That's like a bit. It's like a joke.
[00:00:08] You asked me this in complete sincerity, like on the street yesterday. You're like, it's like...
[00:00:16] It's like a bit.
[00:00:17] You know how people didn't know Lean was real? They're like, you know, it's just a goof. Like, no one's doing Lean. No, people are doing Lean.
[00:00:24] As far as I understand, it's like Super Saiyan Jacking Off.
[00:00:30] I just, like, I can understand Lean because like a drink that gets you high...
[00:00:36] Like everyone can enjoy that. But like, I just don't get like what is the appeal of like extending a Jack Off past...
[00:00:47] Like, what happens at hour one that like you couldn't have achieved before?
[00:00:55] I... It's gotta be a bit... I mean like the only thing I can think of is like, you're not gonna believe this.
[00:01:00] I was Jacking for two hours today and everyone's like, that is hilarious.
[00:01:05] I mean it's like... I feel like it's Malort. Like, like it's a bit.
[00:01:09] Uh, it's not. Uh, I'm not... I unfortunately was like, this is fucked up, right? Let's look into this.
[00:01:16] Uh, this is a mind destroying activity. It rules. The future is fucked.
[00:01:21] Uh, everyone is gonna be addicted. I thought like... How do I put this?
[00:01:26] This is like crack cocaine porn. They're really innovating. It's cool.
[00:01:30] I can't wait to see gambling.
[00:01:32] Wait, okay. I'm sorry. Is it the porno or the activity?
[00:01:37] My understanding of gooning was... What it was is you just sort of like sit down and you start like tugging the hog.
[00:01:46] Yeah, so...
[00:01:46] And then just don't be stopping for all day.
[00:01:49] So imagine now, instead of like just watching a tuggable video, uh, it seems like there's like a...
[00:01:58] A rapid fire compilation with bi-honoral beats. Am I saying that right? That tell you that you're like a good boy for nutting nonstop, but don't come.
[00:02:08] And it's like, obviously, uh, this will wreck your brain.
[00:02:12] I mean, what happened to the humble sex gifts?
[00:02:19] Well, I think it's because you can't find a porno mag in the woods anymore. Like, that was a huge element. You can, I guess.
[00:02:26] That's true. I mean, you can't, but that would be a little odd. Um, I just like from a logistical perspective, like...
[00:02:33] You got stuff to do, right?
[00:02:35] No, your dick's gonna be losing a lot of HP.
[00:02:38] Like, owie. Like, what? Like, how...
[00:02:41] What is the... What is the...
[00:02:43] The solution for that problem?
[00:02:45] Oh, I think it's like how when you start playing guitar.
[00:02:51] This reminds me... This is one of the best fucking lines.
[00:02:54] I don't remember very many lines from Aqua Dine Hunger Force.
[00:02:56] I like... I don't like love it like some people because I don't smoke weed.
[00:03:00] Um, but I mean, this... This line has stuck with me for a while just because it's like, this is so fucking dumb.
[00:03:08] I love it.
[00:03:09] And it's when Master Shake, he is, you know, bragging about being a sexual dynamo.
[00:03:14] Uh, and he says that he, he wraps his rascal two times so it's joyless and without sensation to punish supermodels.
[00:03:24] Uh, that's... That's what I'm feeling.
[00:03:27] You're gonna get a calloused sheath that...
[00:03:31] Yeah, renders you immune from damage under five.
[00:03:34] Uh, oh yeah, it's the fucking iron rod from some Slade the Spire, one of the best relics.
[00:03:40] Uh...
[00:03:41] But yeah, that's what it is.
[00:03:42] Do you feel educated about the world now?
[00:03:46] I guess so. I still don't...
[00:03:49] Do I do explain like...
[00:03:50] I mean, it seems... Maybe you're hung up on the concept of jacking off.
[00:03:53] I am too, generally speaking, but like...
[00:03:55] I was just about to say like, do these people know you can just like...
[00:03:58] You can be done in like five minutes.
[00:04:00] Like, it's easy.
[00:04:01] Yeah, like you can like...
[00:04:03] You don't have to lose a day.
[00:04:05] Also, why is it called that?
[00:04:07] I mean, like, that's kind of why I thought it was a bit.
[00:04:09] Because it's just like, it's like you explain...
[00:04:12] Somebody explains what it is in a very sort of, uh...
[00:04:15] A high-level, uh...
[00:04:16] Form.
[00:04:17] And you're like, that's ridiculous.
[00:04:19] And then you hear that it's called gooning.
[00:04:21] And it's like, oh, I get it.
[00:04:22] It's a joke.
[00:04:23] Like, this is like Mad Magazine came up with it.
[00:04:26] Yeah, they should call it something, uh...
[00:04:29] Like, super jack-off mode or something.
[00:04:32] Uh, it sucks though, because goon is like, supposed to be for like a thug who is...
[00:04:37] Like, guarding a warehouse.
[00:04:40] And he's gonna get taken out by the bat.
[00:04:42] Now it's like there's a goon guarding the warehouse.
[00:04:44] It's just like, well, maybe in 13 hours there'll be some jizz there.
[00:04:50] Until then, stay away.
[00:04:52] It smells...
[00:04:55] Weird.
[00:04:55] Welcome to Anime Sickos.
[00:05:26] It's a podcast for geniuses and the only podcast where we take a look at the, uh...
[00:05:30] Four pillars of modern misery.
[00:05:32] What are they?
[00:05:33] They're anime gaming, posting, and jobs, of course.
[00:05:36] And I'm Tom.
[00:05:38] And anime sicko.
[00:05:40] I'm Joe and anime sicko.
[00:05:42] Now we could just start talking, but I really like playing the cog talk bumper.
[00:05:46] And we really don't get a lot of chances to do it.
[00:05:49] So, we're gonna talk about work in like one second.
[00:05:52] So here it is.
[00:05:54] Cog talk.
[00:05:56] Cog talk.
[00:05:56] Cog talk.
[00:05:57] Cog talk.
[00:05:59] Cog talk.
[00:06:01] Cog talk.
[00:06:03] Cog talk.
[00:06:08] Cog talk.
[00:06:20] Cog talk.
[00:06:21] laid off uh it was not i don't feel like targeted or like uh it was the result of like
[00:06:28] lack of performance because it was literally a something like a 15 percent like reduction instead
[00:06:35] we're talking a big cut yeah and didn't it just happen didn't you like it like isn't that that's
[00:06:40] 15 percent of an already hugely reduced number from the last one yeah yeah there there was another
[00:06:47] round and i this is really funny i don't know if you've done this well i don't know if you've gotten
[00:06:54] laid off ever but they often come in like two rounds because they cut and then they're like
[00:06:58] is it fucked can we keep cutting can we hit bone uh it's gooning it's like like like can i stop can i
[00:07:06] not come and do go another hour uh and then they they cut more uh because they they can so this is
[00:07:14] actually the first time i've been uh like let go from a job or like basically been asked to not
[00:07:21] come actually i wasn't going anywhere i was remote they were like please get your disgusting fingers
[00:07:27] off the company property of the computer um the way you use your computer is extremely distasteful to us
[00:07:35] use your personal computer only you little freak i had a lot of signs or intuition that something like
[00:07:42] this was coming but then i was had those fears sort of hand waving away by other people who also got
[00:07:48] laid off i can say from my perspective uh i i can confirm joe had these fears and the way that that
[00:07:56] happened uh this is a sort of generalization a simplification of the truth but it it's true in
[00:08:03] in spirit um so every single day i wake up and joe wakes up before me so every single day i would wake
[00:08:10] up and i look at my phone and there would be a text from joe waiting for me uh and it would be in all
[00:08:15] capital letters and it would be there's a gun to my head it's more like a screenshot of something deranged
[00:08:24] uh but yeah every day was just like i think this is gonna be when they do it here's here's like the
[00:08:30] thing especially like i can deal with ambiguity if it's ambiguity existing in a structure uh i cannot
[00:08:38] have ambiguity and no structure um which is kind of what was happening because uh the company was in a
[00:08:47] transitory period to put everything on would you believe agile you know like that that old chestnut
[00:08:52] and to be clear this also involved training for me for a new role which is why this is so funny
[00:08:58] because it was very funny like they just trained him to be a cum master that's why you know about
[00:09:04] gooning like i uh was getting onboarded i was setting up backlogs i uh i was very excited i attended lots
[00:09:14] of training lots of instructor-led training uh and the day i got let go and they turned off my computer
[00:09:21] was like the was a day i was like gonna take over someone's meeting for them which would have been like
[00:09:26] like like it would have been like a nice step it'd be like yeah i can do that because i'm i get it now
[00:09:31] you know well i never got to do that because uh they turned everything off so i can only think of
[00:09:37] goodfellas because it's like i was learning and being a good email boy and then they led me to the room
[00:09:44] and they're like oh no and then they fucking shoot me uh the the other omen that like stood out you know
[00:09:53] when you're just like going about your life and then like just some detail jumps out at you and
[00:09:58] then later you're like oh that you know that that was interesting one of them was just a tweet which
[00:10:03] is just like it doesn't really matter what jobs you take in your 20s it's like the jobs you the job
[00:10:10] choices you make in your 30s are actually what matter and when i when i read that i was like well
[00:10:16] it doesn't apply to me because i'm employed and i'm a lovely tax paying unit i'm gonna live forever
[00:10:22] obviously a week later that's changed uh and i just can't it's really rattling around in my head
[00:10:28] that's bad i don't like that tweet that you said to me just now because that's the years that i'm at
[00:10:33] in uh that's my age now fuck dude a lot of people have been asking me how's joe doing how's joe oh
[00:10:42] like tell me i know he won't tell me but tell give me give me to me straight an explicit term is
[00:10:47] materially speaking like we're fine for for many reasons just yeah me only if we're just talking me
[00:10:53] uh i'm a pretty aggressive saver uh i don't spend actually i'm a depressive which gives me the amazing
[00:11:00] ability to not want to do anything so i end up saving money so i've always had a nice cushion
[00:11:04] um uh we bought our place before everything got expensive so we're like obviously living in like the
[00:11:11] effectively the 30s as far as living cost goes um and then that's not including uh my wife
[00:11:18] her income is fine she's fine and not that i'm not like gonna be homeless i'm fine and furthermore i do
[00:11:25] get something like i think it's eight weeks severance so i have a little bit of time to like figure out what
[00:11:30] i'm doing yeah and uh insurance till september i believe yeah yeah which i think it's just the same
[00:11:36] a week so i'm it's not like a well it sucks because like i have to find an entire new direction in life
[00:11:42] it does not come with uh like a a doom counter over me it's more just like i don't know what my next
[00:11:50] freaking step is yeah but like when people ask me like is joe like like is he in danger i'm like joe is
[00:11:57] at least in the short term doing so much better because as i said i get a text from him every day
[00:12:02] saying there's a gun to my head and like well they shot the gun and now the gun's gone like the gun's
[00:12:09] gone yeah like i don't think like i didn't feel great about the layoff but i would not call it a
[00:12:16] negative feeling it was like once i realized like this is how it went out it was like hey just say
[00:12:22] no there's gonna be some emails going out if you got laid off if you get an email it's because you're
[00:12:27] laid off uh and uh i got an email and like i didn't like it wasn't it was like immediately
[00:12:33] the ghost in the house was gone yeah uh and the thing i i complain complain to you about this i
[00:12:41] complain to winnie about this a lot too it's just like um i have absolutely no issues with the remote
[00:12:48] stuff uh i think i have an issue being a full remote person at a company that is not full remote
[00:12:54] uh just because i never feel like there's a clear delineation between start and stop it's just like
[00:13:06] the house instead of a work day being sort of the organizing unit for you know a weekday it just felt
[00:13:14] like work comes in weeks yes like there is weeks and those weeks involve sleeping like you go to bed
[00:13:21] but like that's not a new day it's like still the same prison sentence so were you not just like
[00:13:27] slapping that laptop lid shut at five uh and just saying fuck it like i do i i mean i i was at times
[00:13:36] uh and i it was just like more of a matter of like the space is tainted do you understand like i'm i'm home
[00:13:46] alone mostly uh except for the cats like doing the least enjoyable part of my life working and then
[00:13:56] like it ends and then like my family comes home and like the house is alive again like do you see
[00:14:01] the clear i think my wife being here all the time also is i think the key difference because it was
[00:14:09] it's always very funny when you're just like tom you know about remote work and i'm just like and
[00:14:15] i'm in my head i'm preparing to say yes joe it's so fun and no downsides and you're like yeah you
[00:14:21] know how it makes you want to like claw your skull out of your head and die i'm like uh yeah i was
[00:14:29] gonna say that um just the the nagging feeling that only got worse as time went on and this is not
[00:14:35] specific to this job because it was also the case at the previous job you know uh it's just like
[00:14:40] you always during the work day at home like even if you get up to go to the bathroom change laundry
[00:14:47] there's this nagging sensation that you're like doing it on someone else's time and it's like
[00:14:51] the cop in your head times 100 now he moved in that's so weird because for me i love doing things
[00:15:00] during work hours because i'm just like i'm getting paid to do this shit like case in point
[00:15:06] folks at home you may not know this like literally right now it is 11 28 a.m on a thursday i'm at work
[00:15:14] but like no one i don't have a meeting till two and i don't have anything that needs to be i don't
[00:15:20] have any due dates so i'm just like hell yeah let's do it yeah i mean i was also on a different time
[00:15:26] zone so i was also earlier in that regard there was just a lot of stuff you know what actually okay
[00:15:32] i think i may have am i right with this maybe this is a part of understanding it because this is
[00:15:37] something that um i was talking to you about yesterday and something that i've been experiencing
[00:15:42] because i have some work anxiety because it's like so clear that i'm being shown the door
[00:15:49] um like they're giving you a loaded gun and they're like okay uh yeah and just and this is like
[00:15:55] another thing about remote work that i i'm like oh actually now i see there is a downside which is
[00:16:01] you know my manager thinks that i'm a little baby who like the like i if i stack three blocks i'll be
[00:16:08] like look daddy tweet um and then and he's so embarrassing yeah great daddy uh and i'm just
[00:16:16] like how can i convince him that i don't stack three blocks um you stay like i'm actually smart yeah
[00:16:22] i i can make a pyramid um and like that and and you know it's just i was i was feeling that stress i
[00:16:31] was feeling how like oh shit like the only skills that i've learned on this job are like basic logic
[00:16:38] and which is impossible to demonstrate i can't just tell someone like just so you know i'm smart and i
[00:16:45] might not know any programming languages but i understand the foundations of logic therefore but and
[00:16:50] it's like they're just like oh you don't know the language then kill yourself um so like i'm like
[00:16:55] the only thing i know is like basic knowledge and the i know this one can this one proprietary tool
[00:17:01] inside and out well that's unused well that's useless because it's fucking proprietary and especially
[00:17:07] useless because they're turning it off in a year uh forever uh which is why i feel like i'm getting
[00:17:20] going back in time to 2012 when i had just graduated with a fucking creative writing degree and had no
[00:17:27] work experience uh-oh oopsie that's bad so i was feeling really bad and i was telling you about this
[00:17:33] that there would be times when like i didn't have anything going on like there was nothing like i had
[00:17:40] i had what could be free time but it's like my brain is like no you've blocked this time off for like
[00:17:46] sitting and feeling weird like i wanted to go on a run for multiple days this week because like it'll
[00:17:54] get me it'll take my mind off of the stress you know i'll feel better moving my body doing exercise
[00:18:00] and like the time would come it's like now is the time you have to run and i'm just like
[00:18:04] no i'm busy like sitting and feeling bad like i have to do it and like was that happening to you
[00:18:13] yeah just like i gotta process this as if there's anything to process other than this sucks
[00:18:18] like it's not like a deep experience that i need to figure out what it means i don't like it but
[00:18:23] nonetheless it's like yeah no i gotta gotta sit here and work on this i know i was gonna turn on the tv
[00:18:32] but i will oh it's being a turn on the tv we can get to this later i'm just gonna i'm gonna mention it
[00:18:40] we put a pin in it come back to it maybe or maybe not i finally you came over yesterday just to chill
[00:18:45] i finally got you to watch an episode of severance i've been trying to get you to do this since 2022
[00:18:50] uh and you were fucking right congrats you're right it's good okay it's so good i was uh
[00:18:56] immediately hooked after one episode uh i love how shitty and bleak the homes are that they uh
[00:19:04] destroyed their brains for yeah yes yes the production design is out of this world the office
[00:19:12] looks like shit like yeah that's that's the thing that's really like killing that's like absolutely
[00:19:18] devastating is that like obviously it's like a corporate horror it's like a office horror story
[00:19:23] so the office is gonna be hell and then when they escape the office they're still in hell and it's just
[00:19:30] like oh my god ah you were talking about this it's just like it's this is happening more and more
[00:19:35] it's like it used to be that if you killed yourself as a work freak your reward would be luxury and more
[00:19:41] and more you kill yourself as a work freak and your reward you get like a a ranch from like the 90s by
[00:19:48] which i mean a ranch home not like cows not not you're not yeah fucking yellowstone yeah um
[00:19:54] yeah it's i really so i really enjoy it it's really well acted it's very funny but darkly and quiet it's
[00:20:00] like it's always like just sneaking the knife in you yeah so adam scott who looks very much like tom
[00:20:06] cruise uh from some angles although tom cruise doesn't really look like tom cruise head-on because
[00:20:12] he's got the one simpsons tooth so yeah so i don't know but anyway uh adam scott's very funny uh
[00:20:19] uh the premise of it we'll just do the quick the quick rundown you know how like when you go to work
[00:20:28] you feel like you're a different person you feel like you're leaving yourself behind and you're
[00:20:32] becoming like a lesser version of yourself that has to do a little dance and then you get to be you
[00:20:39] when you leave tom is correct uh my angle is going to be do you know how it's just like the feeling of
[00:20:46] letting the clock run out but both both are both are correct so and the premise of severance is that
[00:20:52] there's this like uh a company that uh has this thing called the severance procedure so what it does
[00:21:00] is it makes it so your work self and your your your quote unquote real self are separated like you
[00:21:07] when you walk into work your brain becomes work you and you cannot remember any shit outside and vice versa
[00:21:15] for the outside people it's great because you just like you go into a elevator at nine and then you're
[00:21:21] instantly coming out of the elevator at five and you get to do whatever you want however the flip side
[00:21:26] of that is that your work self is a hell slave uh with no life uh who wants to die anyway i don't
[00:21:36] want to get too much we'll do a separate episode it's the same topic like it's correct it's on topic
[00:21:41] uh well let's talk about how your layoff notice was in french and for the wrong day i don't
[00:21:49] yeah i i got the email was very funny because it was like uh the gist of it was this it was this was
[00:21:57] not the the actual language but it was like hey uh we were gonna do this next week but the livestock
[00:22:07] found out and started freaking out uh so here is uh what's gonna happen and they uh kind of moved
[00:22:16] things up uh one thing that's very funny is i was immediately thinking of like oh this is like the
[00:22:23] temple grandin thing right like you have to keep them calm right before you kill them right um which
[00:22:30] you might think oh you probably got that from the andrew jackson jihad song uh maybe uh but i also got
[00:22:38] it from uh because she came to work temple grandin spoke at work uh it wasn't about that it was about
[00:22:45] neurodivergence but uh that's what made me that was another omen where i was like huh no that was the
[00:22:52] cover story and after she was done she met with the c-suite and they're like this all right no guy
[00:22:58] like what's the most goodest way to use the chigurr machine i am not in a dissimilar situation
[00:23:07] uh like i don't have explicit certs uh i've worked in project management i have worked in it i've been
[00:23:16] worked in it project management and now i've worked in like i like i've done all these things i don't
[00:23:22] have certs for them i just was deployed to go do work in them so now obviously that's not i should
[00:23:29] have fucking been getting that as i was there but uh the thing about getting certs when you're working
[00:23:36] is it's like the same feeling as looking for a job when you're working you're like all right done with
[00:23:41] my job oh look for a new one never mind i will keep doing this until i die yeah it's like
[00:23:46] like look for a job while you're working it's like yeah you have your job and then there's an
[00:23:50] even worse job almost incalculably worse uh the worst job i think that there could ever be is
[00:23:56] looking for a job and also not only that you don't get paid and this is the other thing too it's like
[00:24:02] when i'm talking certs i am talking mostly in the tech space and it's i don't know if that's smart
[00:24:08] like because like any company that is based in the u.s is going to if they haven't already
[00:24:15] just pay people that are not here to do everything and i'm not like this is the move like this was
[00:24:25] this is like if you don't do this the the mckinsey types will attack you
[00:24:33] so i don't know if i want to work in tech necessarily uh or continue to you should become
[00:24:39] a fucking carpenter dude everyone really loves and respects uh custom furniture these days it's not
[00:24:48] like any it's not like uh capitalism is pushing towards mass-produced crap or anything uh you know
[00:24:54] what sucks is that you're talking about project management and that's like a really good skill to
[00:25:00] have because you know even in and out of tech yeah everyone you're always going to need someone who can
[00:25:03] manage a project and that's like that's so good that would be so good to have on my resume and i
[00:25:07] realized like shit i do do project management like what was directing and producing sicko shock too
[00:25:14] but uh you know i was managing a lot of people i was putting together i you know came up with the
[00:25:20] you know requirements for the project i had came up with the plan i executed the plan i wrangled the
[00:25:27] people i delegated tasks like project management but like i can't actually like that's not actually
[00:25:33] useful for me that's like well that's not 100 true because if you actually like wanted to get
[00:25:39] certified in project management in order to sit for your pmi you have to have a certain number of
[00:25:44] i don't know what to call them applicable hours but like something like that would work uh like
[00:25:50] wedding planning counts because obviously that's crazy oh yeah well i was just saying that if anyone
[00:25:56] were to like verify that i like what see what project he actually did they would put on the podcast
[00:26:02] and the first thing they would hear is fuck work i hate work i will always steal from work
[00:26:08] yeah like well i will not hire this guy uh uh this guy is brave he's willing to say it i'm i will
[00:26:17] always steal from work i you know sometimes i'm like wait a minute like some people like write
[00:26:23] for their job but like that seems like if i'm scared about losing my job that feels like a 10 000
[00:26:31] times worse version do people write for like it's are you thinking of 2012 maybe i don't know i i mean
[00:26:40] where the money is obviously is to just get the the sub stack audience and then feed them hate and
[00:26:47] then they give you money in return and then you create a very lucrative loop what i do with my
[00:26:54] sub stack the anime sit goes sub stack by the way if you don't know that it exists why would you
[00:26:58] anime sit goes dot sub stack.com is uh every like two and a half months i write two reviews for movies
[00:27:07] or games or books i looked at uh and then i forget that it's around but it's fun to pick up and put it
[00:27:14] down that's what it's all about i guess like the other thing uh if i can speak on project management
[00:27:19] for a second is like if everything is going to be agile and like self-organized agile teams which is to
[00:27:28] say the teams can self-direct and do all that stuff and work directly with the product owner uh which is
[00:27:36] the ideal i don't know i don't actually think this is like the best way to do it but it's certainly
[00:27:40] the way that uh people like to talk about tech doing sprints and iterations the thing is if you're
[00:27:49] in a self-organizing operation like that that's doing sprints what is the there is no project manager
[00:27:55] like there may be a scrum master but that's not a project manager so i don't really know what the
[00:28:02] what that means in the context of like tech man i don't know i don't know this is all about my
[00:28:10] this is the other thing that i think has doomed me as a professional person and i wish i wish i could
[00:28:16] go and tell myself not to do this but i'm also realizing past me would be like surely you don't
[00:28:22] expect me to follow this advice and current me would be like yeah i just thought it might be worth a shot
[00:28:27] to go back in time but just like my constantly my thought is whenever i encounter anything
[00:28:36] i'm just like do i need to know about this to do my job no then i will not fucking care so like
[00:28:43] what all the shit you said i'm just like man i don't really understand all that i don't know what
[00:28:48] those terms meant and i'm just like i know i've heard them but i'm just like is that something that
[00:28:52] i need to know right now no then i've been who fucking cares uh and that's an oh man that's
[00:28:59] another thing that makes my manager my current manager thinks i stack three blocks because he'll
[00:29:03] ask me something and i'm like well that never was relevant to me so i never tried to learn i didn't
[00:29:09] see that shadow in the cave yeah i was like for me they were like you need to look at the doggy
[00:29:16] shadow so i was looking at the doggy shadow um i don't know that there are any other shadows sir
[00:29:23] blocks only stack three high uh there's no such thing as four i the other thing i've been
[00:29:30] entertaining is unfortunately the the evil move of additional grad school but i was looking at the
[00:29:36] one-year master's in accounting program at uic for the simple reason well there's two reasons one
[00:29:43] accounting accountant a cpa is a position a role that is mandated by the state which is say it is
[00:29:51] required which is to say i proof it's yeah i mean it's it's they can't make it agile and go away
[00:29:58] there are laws that require it the other thing and this shouldn't matter as much to me as it does but
[00:30:06] uh in the wake of this this this current layoff it does because now i'm having to deal with the
[00:30:11] issue again uh an accountant is a straightforward understandable job title you say an accountant
[00:30:17] and you're like okay cool thank you hey there's this account position over at x and y company cool
[00:30:21] like my current title which i'm not going to say is like what the fuck does that mean man like it
[00:30:27] says senior before but like it doesn't it doesn't indicate clear responsibilities or like expectations
[00:30:36] beyond the fact that it sounds like i'm important yeah i have senior in front of my name which is absurd
[00:30:42] given everything um and like also it's gonna like if i if and when i'm ever applying for other jobs and
[00:30:51] either i will apply for other senior level positions and they'll be like you are wildly underqualified
[00:30:57] or they'll be like why are you taking such a such a cut downwards i'm like well because i had a fake
[00:31:05] title before and i was never senior yeah i also just can't stand this is the thing i'm already preemptively
[00:31:15] anxious over is i hate the the sort of interview resume thing and i get why you do this i'm not stupid
[00:31:25] i just it feels disingenuous because it's like you always have to present like things you did as
[00:31:31] somehow like you only did them you never want to be like oh my team together we did no it's like you
[00:31:36] have to fucking present it as like you were somehow like the sole driver of this effort and i i can't i
[00:31:44] always even in an interview i will like start minimizing not minimizing but i will like acknowledge
[00:31:52] the larger context that it wasn't just me bringing reality into will and i hate that because like
[00:31:59] that's not the meta yeah but if i don't do that i feel i literally feel like i'm lying it's really bad
[00:32:08] i haven't updated i think i fuck yeah every time i'm doing my resume when i think like i gotta start
[00:32:16] applying for jobs this is not oh things are bad i gotta get my resume done and i run to that issue
[00:32:21] which is just like as i'm doing the resume i feel so like ill about how fucking gross it is and like
[00:32:28] i'm like i know this is wrong like i don't have the satan instinct to do this correctly
[00:32:34] and my resume just looks stupid and it's like maybe i'm stupid maybe i'm incompetent you don't
[00:32:40] want to touch it you want to touch it the same way you don't want to touch like uh like a piece of
[00:32:45] toilet paper covered in shit like it's a transitional object okay like you are you are using it briefly to
[00:32:52] make it into the garbage and that's what a resume is uh and you are acutely aware it's toilet paper
[00:33:00] that's such a good fucking metaphor dude i'm going like and that's also why i never ever ever keep it
[00:33:08] updated even though like i have told myself constantly at jobs even when the job was secure to be like
[00:33:15] there's no reason you can't just like punch it up right i just can't do it and i can't do it because
[00:33:20] i will not touch it unless i literally have to dude what you all the thing you just said but even more so
[00:33:27] i just fucking realized with a pit of fucking dread in my stomach that makes me want to vom
[00:33:33] big time not as a joke i haven't touched my linkedin in maybe five years and it's just like shit if i
[00:33:42] want to get a job i have to i have to do my linkedin i just added the job i was laid off from like three
[00:33:54] weeks ago after three years i can't stand linkedin because it's demonic it's demonic uh because if
[00:34:01] you're not actively looking for a job what are you getting out of it because it's like a bunch of
[00:34:04] insane posts from people like i got laid off but i'm still a little worm and i'm happy to work it's just
[00:34:08] like yeah it's very uncomfortable uh it's it's a social network for only for only severed people
[00:34:17] you know like people who have had their brains cut off so that they're like human part is gone and
[00:34:21] they're trying to like hang out it's like i don't want to hang out with these people it feels like toxic
[00:34:26] positivity but it's not even like that positive but it's yeah i mean that's part of what makes it so
[00:34:32] toxic is that like there's something that is objectively negative and they're like this is positive
[00:34:36] we love this um fucking like i still oh my god oh god i just i'm thinking about this i'm like is this
[00:34:44] gonna be so annoying to like do with the ui no doubt which is like so i'm i was working at this old
[00:34:53] company and then the part that i was you know the the group the team that i was a part of got acquired
[00:35:00] and i never fucking did that so like i'm still on linkedin working for that old company
[00:35:05] and have been for like seven years oh that's fine who cares just change it and and if anyone asks
[00:35:11] you didn't get acquired that was a new job you interviewed very well for oh yeah no that's right
[00:35:17] i was actually i was doing i'm practicing my fiction writing skills uh and improv skills right now so if
[00:35:23] anyone any employers are listening well fuck if any employers are listening to this they heard me say
[00:35:27] fuck work i hate working i will always steal from work that was also acting i'm an actor now
[00:35:32] i don't know if you knew that it's so you know what sucks is that like you need to have more money
[00:35:41] you can't just have the money you got this is not so when they lay you off and i just found this out
[00:35:47] they stop paying you it what like as like like they take like your raise away or yeah no i mean like
[00:35:53] zero dollars oh that's like the worst raise there is uh yeah so obviously there will be budget implications
[00:36:01] everything's expensive uh it's fine um because america is an idea and a place that will live forever
[00:36:09] and the other thing that's great is that because uh joe biden like can't talk because his brain went
[00:36:17] away yes uh very likely the reagan map is gonna fucking happen because joe biden can't like his
[00:36:26] tongue fell out hey tom from the future here uh we didn't know when we recorded this last thursday
[00:36:33] that joe biden was about to fall off the coconut tree and stop being the nominee for president so uh
[00:36:41] please bear with us that we didn't fucking know about that when we spend legitimately seven minutes
[00:36:49] riffing about how bad a candidate he is enjoy uh yeah he just doesn't he can't talk i mean like you go
[00:36:59] back and you listen to that old episode one podcast episode where there's there's three joe biden's
[00:37:05] and they're just saying absolute talking about big lawn cars they saw uh it's very good uh again
[00:37:12] vanilla twisties from the gas station like that was hilarious and like so true and so like it's funny
[00:37:20] but it's it's depressing because this is the truth at the time now it's like if joe biden could talk
[00:37:27] like the biden's on that podcast episode like everyone would be like okay he's back he's back
[00:37:34] uh his brain work again he's talking about the long car he's talking about corn pop i bet if you
[00:37:40] asked him about corn pop now he wouldn't even mention how he had hairy legs um it's uh but yeah
[00:37:48] that's gonna make the economy way better when big hitler comes back and uh is the king yeah the the lion
[00:37:55] is gonna love big hitler um it's just like so like stupidly selfish uh obviously he's acting like
[00:38:06] people have called it the furor bunker and it's like i don't that's pretty funny just like he is
[00:38:11] a hold up in the white house hunter's calling the shots uh it's it's i get the sense that
[00:38:19] every choice being made at this point is like his or he's signing off on it very directly which is why
[00:38:25] everything's very bad did you see that photo of like four senators leaving the meeting with him and
[00:38:31] they're all leaving like they have like the thing where you're kind of blowing air out of your cheeks
[00:38:36] uh it was like no but klobacher uh uh cory booker and then two others both of them were just like
[00:38:45] yikes uh and you know getty images uh in the corner huh oh that's good um but it the fact that
[00:38:54] like all the government not all of them but many governors flew out there and they're like he's
[00:39:00] great he's amazing actually has made me convinced he's been dead for a while yeah it's just when they're
[00:39:08] like one thing that i can tell you after my meeting with joe biden is that his grasp of language
[00:39:14] indicates that he can communicate and it's like great he did not call yeah it's like if like you
[00:39:23] know how your dog doesn't know what words are well that's not true for joe biden he understands the
[00:39:32] concept of words the polling ahead of this massive shit sandwich eating was interesting because
[00:39:40] every swing state senate dem was leading despite the stinker at the top of the ticket which is like
[00:39:47] a clear indicator that like the problem is at the top of the ticket but as far as i know that's all
[00:39:52] fucking gone 100 years of trump is the map everyone's like how come well trump's an asshole too and he's
[00:40:00] also has uh senile he's a senile bitch too how come how come that's not making headlines you can't run the
[00:40:10] flaws are like trump's flaws were on fucking display in 2016 and the you know they hit larian
[00:40:18] populace of our terrible country said love it yes not a problem for us meanwhile in you know 2024
[00:40:26] uh everyone's like i'm really worried i have like my worst fears are that joe biden is a dead mummy
[00:40:35] who can't think and then he comes out and is like uh listen jack your worst fears are confirmed it's
[00:40:42] like that his head falls off yes that like do you not understand that like my worst fears confirmed
[00:40:50] hits so much harder emotionally and takes up so much more space in your head than like the guy who
[00:40:58] sucks still sucks exactly the same like and he's out of power currently though like that's the other
[00:41:04] thing you know what i mean like the guy who sucks is not walking around with the nuclear football he's
[00:41:09] going to be very soon again but it's so funny how it's it's just like like i am donald trump when i
[00:41:15] come back into the white house day one i'm gonna do all the i'm gonna do a lot of war and climate
[00:41:22] change will become permanent in a like it's like i'm gonna make all the green out like you know how
[00:41:28] there's been any conservation efforts ever in history well i'm gonna undo that day one and it's just like
[00:41:35] oh thanks man i'm going to wage war on the wetlands i'm gonna do what other presidents were too pussy to
[00:41:41] do jesus christ it is funny though that there is this doom loop with biden which is like oh i'm scared
[00:41:47] because the president's brain is fucked he can sort of soothe my fears by getting out there and talking
[00:41:53] oh no his brain is fucked you know what he can soothe my fears by getting out there again
[00:41:59] and uh obviously uh i think they think they can do this until the convention oh that's the other
[00:42:05] thing the convention is here uh it's going to be nuts i like they were really pushing for a virtual
[00:42:11] thing that was with no conflict the longer this goes on i don't think that's going to be the case
[00:42:17] uh i'm talking in terms of protesting or something it's i just yeah it's uh i'm gonna stay away from
[00:42:26] downtown i mean like don't go downtown any at any point but i'm gonna continue to not go downtown
[00:42:31] when that shit's happening um you know what sucks is when he went on again the the interview that was
[00:42:40] meant to be like no now i know he looked like he didn't know about thinking during the debate this
[00:42:47] is the one that was supposed to be like two hours long and then it was like sweaty in nine minutes
[00:42:51] oh i have no idea how long i but i knew that they said like what will you feel like if trump wins and
[00:42:57] he'll be like i'll be happy that i did my best and it's like that's the worst like the achewood panel
[00:43:04] like oh my god that is the worst answer in the universe like like how like we make fun of kids
[00:43:10] when they say that like what do you like if i if if i said like if we played like a video game and
[00:43:18] it's like tom what did you feel about losing it's like i feel good because i tried my best you would
[00:43:22] like roast me about that for a year and it's just like yeah when like when it becomes illegal to be
[00:43:28] gay uh well at least i'll know that i like played my best ball like i had fun out there i didn't let
[00:43:38] it i didn't let the haters get me down i don't think that the numbers on a clock really the position
[00:43:44] doesn't matter you can draw them anywhere uh and they're really all bunched up on the side anyway
[00:43:51] where did that become something that everyone knew about because i learned about the whole clock
[00:43:55] drawing thing from um the tv show hannibal because i didn't watch all of it because it was too gross
[00:44:02] it was too bleak but like the the main guy is like going to hannibal as his uh therapist and he doesn't
[00:44:09] know hannibal is hannibal yet he doesn't know he's a cannibal murderer he just thinks he's like a regular
[00:44:13] guy yeah uh and he keeps making him draw a clock every episode or other every you know therapy session
[00:44:21] and you know we see the guy draw the clock perfectly and the bit and then like near the end of season one
[00:44:27] someone else is looking through hannibal's notes and all the clocks are fucked and it's just like oh i
[00:44:35] oh oh and like that's how i learned about the like the can't draw a clock thing it was so spooky when
[00:44:42] that shit happened wait he has dementia he was just so fucked he was just like extremely brain
[00:44:48] fucked like he he wasn't perceiving time and reality right uh because hannibal was manipulating him with
[00:44:56] sexual magic i think i started really seeing it because it was used during the first trump term a
[00:45:03] lot uh because you recall uh he did a cognitive test as well uh it was just like is this a giraffe
[00:45:10] true false uh please circle the number nine no one has ever the doctor said sir i've never seen
[00:45:18] someone stack three blocks i've never seen someone know that it was an elephant so hard to brag about
[00:45:24] like a negative first grade worksheet is so fucking funny but that that's when i started seeing it online
[00:45:35] a lot yeah the thing about that is that it works like it like that's the thing that like when you i think
[00:45:43] one of his most brilliant tactical moves is realizing maybe he doesn't even know this maybe it's just
[00:45:48] completely fucking random not random but like he fell into this tactical move which is when you have a uh
[00:45:56] base of support which is all like hitlered up american freak pig people yeah car dealership owners
[00:46:04] yeah like like real demons like satans on earth who deserve nothing but fire um when that is like your base
[00:46:15] saying the dumbest shit on earth and just being like and that's great like it fucking works yes
[00:46:22] and like the the the effete intellectual elite being like well actually let cognitive test this for
[00:46:30] but it's like all that that does is like you look like a nerd he looks more right because you use your
[00:46:38] nerd voice like the jew the jews are trying to tear us down uh whoever that was i'm gonna assume they're
[00:46:46] jew yeah what was that about what like you know there's the internet right like the globe is a thing
[00:46:53] like you can't i don't know i'm seeing a lot of euphemisms a lot of repurpose euphemisms online i'm
[00:47:01] seeing a low trust people to mean things that may not surprise you
[00:47:09] it's all fun but will i so here's the other thing about a job is like this city used to be a place
[00:47:16] where you and a bud could go down and get a job killing cows at a leisurely pace with your butts
[00:47:26] no rush every once in a while someone would fall in and become the cow and then it's like you have
[00:47:32] a story for your wife when you come home it's just like yeah it happened you know uh it's like hey
[00:47:36] honey you know the burgers tonight that's bill just reading about the stockyards it's so clear that
[00:47:41] like everyone was having a just a good time and they were there like 19 hours a day which is
[00:47:46] probably very fulfilling yeah where else would they want to go that's why they're sticking around
[00:47:51] so long yeah some book about this called the jungle did you know how the jungle is full of like
[00:47:55] fun and games like you read the jungle book you tarzan you do all sorts of cool things you can
[00:48:00] swing on vines oh man i don't know what i was uh what chicago history thing i was reading but it was
[00:48:07] in the context of just like a group of immigrants that were just there for like they haven't found
[00:48:14] work yet and they were staying at this place in the slaughterhouse and it was like uh a quote from
[00:48:18] a lithuanian immigrant it was like for the first this is the first time in my life where i feel like if
[00:48:24] i do not get money i will truly die yeah man yeah yeah i would not be surprised if uh maybe he was
[00:48:34] misled about the working conditions he might maybe he told him there was a bunch of cool buds you could
[00:48:40] chill with for 19 hours a day whoo baby you know the other funny thing is uh just like the simpsons
[00:48:47] oh that's a good show yeah that's a funny thing no what's the other funny thing just like the idea of
[00:48:52] like retirement uh like the future uh what it means like obviously i have a 401k i need to fucking
[00:49:02] do shit with that now and move it over to the next thing or whatever i'm gonna do but there's also like
[00:49:09] this part of you that's like this is playing money right like
[00:49:17] like this could be used to pay a dinosaur like it's not it's not real
[00:49:25] but also if i don't do it i'm fucked somehow yeah i'm just thinking about like like kevin was telling
[00:49:32] us the other day that he got a quote from some window company to redo the windows in his condo
[00:49:39] and obviously this is like a ridiculous like a joke company like this is not something that like
[00:49:45] happens rather like the the only people who are hiring this company are rube people who have more
[00:49:52] money than sense because any any normal person sees this quote and is like bye fucker which was
[00:49:59] for kevin's uh condo which is not huge does not have a ton of windows 32k that's a camry and just like
[00:50:07] if i am like budgeting correctly and scrimping and saving and putting things in you know the funds
[00:50:13] so they go up iras uh which man what a funny name for a fund like that's the people it's like every
[00:50:25] time the money goes in they're like hey that funny quote about margaret thatcher yeah okay i trust these
[00:50:29] guys uh all that and just like well i mean like i'm planning for my future but like what
[00:50:37] if in my future like i gotta pay 40k for something it's like well then all that shit was not
[00:50:42] like bye bye bye bye retirement like it's gone uh it's so fun uh everything is expensive
[00:50:51] that's cool hey people listening out there are you aware of this so like i bet the video game industry
[00:50:59] or like the online media industry is like so stable and lucrative right now hire us to like write for
[00:51:08] your game or your website or something and if you're like do you have a portfolio no this is our
[00:51:15] you gotta listen to all before you speak to us please do the work yeah i mean honestly have some
[00:51:21] fucking respect uh we're the anime sickos we basically have 200 episodes you know and not
[00:51:28] just anyone can make 200 episodes of a podcast only really annoying guys can make 200 episodes of a
[00:51:34] podcast yeah you know what that means it means we have no one in our lives who told us to stop
[00:51:41] because they'd have to be listening to the show that's true that's true it's a uh it's a doom loop as
[00:51:48] well yeah here here i don't know this isn't a car we'll just continue talking let's just continue one thing
[00:51:56] we're talking about future it's impossible to untangle that from the fact that i have a wonderful child
[00:52:03] the when to see the boys he's he's so good he he loves daycare so much dude because his squad is there
[00:52:09] he's i oh my god the pictures of him and the boys like me and the he literally has the boys and he
[00:52:16] cannot wait to get to the boys and he gets so pissed when uh we take him away from the boys
[00:52:22] so i don't know like when playdates become like a thing that you can do i don't know if it's like a
[00:52:27] thing it's like oh you shouldn't do it before i don't i don't fucking know but like have you can
[00:52:31] have playdates with the boys yeah i should probably do that we we have not uh engaged on that front
[00:52:39] like we've talked to their parents a little bit but we've not done like hangout stuff oh yeah this is
[00:52:44] what i wanted to ask you because i mean you obviously grew up uh at the same age at the same time
[00:52:51] did people like did adults teachers anyone in remote positions of power over kids just
[00:53:00] yell all the time like for me it was like the memo was out you can't hit kids anymore but you got
[00:53:06] to yell instead i just felt like so much like not even at me i'm not saying i was getting yelled
[00:53:12] that i was just like that was how conflict was resolved by an adult i'm sure that there were yells
[00:53:19] but like i if i tell you no i don't that doesn't immediately spring to mind it's like yep i remembered
[00:53:27] that i remember the yelling i think this might be a south suburbs thing i i had teachers that i dreaded
[00:53:35] not even because they yelled at me just because they yelled period you know like it was just like
[00:53:41] being in the room when people would get yelled at and it's just like it's it's why would you like
[00:53:48] i guess looking back it's also like why would you want to do that to a bunch of kids anyway
[00:53:53] yeah i mean i you know speaking about the future and the concept of future i i mean this isn't funny
[00:54:00] but i think it's funny like it's just or if not funny at least like isn't it fucked how it's this
[00:54:07] simple like you know how like if you're an adult and like you feel like bad you like have like issues
[00:54:14] and like you can work on them your whole life and never overcome them fully and like you'll always
[00:54:20] have it be a part of you and like where did that come from it's like well if your parents read you
[00:54:26] books you don't have them but if your parents yelled now you're fucked for and it's just like that's
[00:54:32] it like i i don't think it's reductive uh to say that it is really that straightforward uh
[00:54:42] yeah it's just i maybe i just have a lot of memories of just any adult yelling like i remember
[00:54:50] walking around with friends and like some adult just that didn't want to stare near their house was
[00:54:57] just like screaming at us at the top of their lungs and it was like fine because like they have money and
[00:55:01] are bigger it is our right as worms to be yelled at yeah if they don't lay hands on you you can't say
[00:55:07] anything wasn't when you're talking about something where em went to like a pizza place and got yelled
[00:55:13] at oh that's some story you told that i think is the really good story em shared on uh their guest
[00:55:19] though she actually did told it herself again uh i i believe the the pizza person as em was leaving
[00:55:28] just said wow what a weird kid yeah uh that's pretty good okay talking about teachers this teacher
[00:55:40] didn't yell but i i want to tell this because it's a funny story that i tell all the time because it's
[00:55:44] fucking hilarious um i'm gonna tell it now it's about a teacher that i disdained in a big way my third
[00:55:51] grade teacher everyone hated her and we knew going into third grade it's like this teacher fucking sucks
[00:55:57] just you're gonna hate this and we did um and there was one time where she uh looked like a dumbass
[00:56:05] in front of everyone and it was one of the more satisfying experiences of my young life it really
[00:56:11] opened up a new uh era of adult disrespecting from me uh i was just like oh like i can disrespect
[00:56:20] like i can hold adults in this low of an opinion it's like wow whoa the possibilities
[00:56:26] and i've only gotten better at it since so uh we i come from the suburb wilmette uh and
[00:56:34] in third grade we had a like a week of history class that was about wilmette local history so i think
[00:56:41] a week is a little too much but whatever uh the town of wilmette was named after some french i would
[00:56:49] assume fur trapper or trader or i don't give a fuck who he was but he was french and his last name was
[00:56:55] spelled o-u-i-l-m-e-t-t-e you know like the french word we wilmette wilmette so it was pronounced
[00:57:05] wilmette you would be in a french accent but it was clearly wilmette was his last name and the
[00:57:10] anglicized version with the w-i-l at the front wilmette that's what the town is called wilmette
[00:57:16] named after wilmette we all knew this because like every once in a while in town you see it spelled the
[00:57:22] french way and you obviously ask your mommy why that oh and she says those people not learn how to
[00:57:28] read that's so sad yeah uh so everybody knows that it's also wilmette anyway so she says our teacher
[00:57:37] who we all hate she's like actually the correct pronunciation of the french name from which
[00:57:45] wilmette derives the town's name is uly may and i look at the word and i'm like that doesn't seem
[00:57:54] right the l comes after the i it's not uly may and so i say are you sure it's uly may i don't think
[00:58:04] it's uly may and she says yes it's uly may a french i once had a french student and he told me that it
[00:58:13] was uly may i went back to my mom my mom knows french not like fluently but like she's she's
[00:58:20] conversational in french she's been to france and talks french and i'm like mom why would you believe
[00:58:26] the kid is that shit uly may and she's like no and i'm like my teachers that it was uly may and she was
[00:58:33] like she's wrong and again this is when like the sort of light bulb turned on that was like wait a
[00:58:40] minute adults could be fucking morons that deserve my contempt and simultaneously i engendered well one
[00:58:49] the french child does not exist like there's no chance and two if they do i have an incredible
[00:58:55] amount of respect for this kid for having i think the best roi of any prank that's ever been pulled
[00:59:02] on a teacher because you know she's been teaching this uly may shit for years yeah it wasn't like last
[00:59:08] year i had a french student and you can meet him in fourth grade in the same building that's a long burn
[00:59:15] that's a really good return like imagine you put a tack on the teacher's chair and like 10 years later
[00:59:22] it's still in her butt
[00:59:27] here's how i would have addressed that as a kid uh i would have uh did you have the desks where like
[00:59:36] you lift them up and you can put your books in them yeah yeah so i would have lifted that up and started
[00:59:40] banging them and saying dumb bitch alert dumb bitch alert that that's uh that's
[00:59:45] how i was educated that's pretty good did you have the concept of shields that was a huge thing in my
[00:59:53] school which was shields because apparently it's just a known thing that when you pack child's lunches
[00:59:59] you have to have something that they find repulsive and don't even want to look at don't even want to
[01:00:04] have on their desk so every lunch period someone is trying to offload some repulsive food item uh and so
[01:00:14] we sort of invented this concept called shields where if you said the word shields you
[01:00:21] everyone is required to visualize shields shooting up preventing things from getting put on your desk
[01:00:28] if you put something on someone's desk after they say shields you are shit like everyone in dirt
[01:00:34] yeah like even like people who are not involved in the content people in other in the other class
[01:00:38] if like hey did you know like laura said shields but fucking david put his carrots on her desk anyway
[01:00:46] it's like david's getting buried under the prison like we're like we're done with david
[01:00:52] david went too far uh i know i this is this might be a uh a microeconomic phenomenon
[01:01:02] uh i it's very polite though i like it yeah this is the north suburbs of the south suburbs writ large
[01:01:09] i think dumb bitch alert versus shields i just don't see like oh did everybody practice this thing
[01:01:15] where you respected people's boundaries i don't think that i mean it wasn't so much a respect because
[01:01:22] like the i the sort of the sort of implication the subtext of shields is that if you don't say
[01:01:27] shields in time you got no fucking recourse like if you get given the repulsive food and you didn't
[01:01:34] say shields in time by the time you notice everyone else has said shields and you're just like
[01:01:39] fuck and then you are you are of course the laughing stock of everyone and then of course in the
[01:01:44] classic way like someone invented a word that breaks shields and then like there's like double
[01:01:50] shields and like so you have to you know yeah it's inflation goes yeah yeah it's it's fucking
[01:01:55] from the end of batman begins when it's like batman you may have solved the problem but now there's the
[01:02:01] junker so that's that what we're talking about work the future the future we're talking about future
[01:02:07] in the context of uh like the wasteland that everything yeah i'm just concerned if like the
[01:02:13] cannibals that ride the waist and they're big machines whether or not they will have an elevated
[01:02:18] volume of speech i don't want them to yell i really don't i don't it's not necessary i'm right there
[01:02:27] this is again still stupid i'm at that part of the recording where i'm loopy so anytime i think
[01:02:32] of something funny i'm like no i'm saying this you said big machine i was telling you about this the
[01:02:37] other day because you said big machine then too when i was in eighth grade or somewhere close to then
[01:02:43] i uh was snookered by marketing into purchasing the album by vel i think is their only one i sure
[01:02:51] fucking hope so they just shouldn't make more than one shouldn't even made one i was sniggered into
[01:02:55] buying the album by velvet revolver the hard rock super group featuring slash from guns and roses
[01:03:01] and the guy from stone temple pilots this was to put it conservatively the worst album of music i've ever
[01:03:09] heard in my life but because i bought it i had to convince myself that i liked it so i listened to
[01:03:13] it a bunch of times like grimacing being like how fun great uh there is a song called big machine
[01:03:20] and this the chorus goes we're all slaves to a big machine we're all slaves to a big machine and i'm
[01:03:30] just like i kind of even as like an eighth grader i'm just like what like no this is what you put out
[01:03:36] like you were like final done record so they can't do that but if that was an electric six song
[01:03:43] that would could be completely like cool and not like cringy it would just yeah absolutely we are
[01:03:49] slaves to big machine he's got they would make it fun they would have sort of a tongue-in-cheek
[01:03:53] bit to it but it's just like this was presented in a very real like i'm about to lay some incredible
[01:03:59] truth on you like this is a this is important do you the other dumb thing we're all slaves to a big
[01:04:04] machine is that it's a name of a like a cloud service uh and i know this because like i would
[01:04:09] get emails that were like big machines is down today and i'm like yeah okay this job is real
[01:04:14] yeah clouds final fantasy 7 that's the ultimate cloud service because you can play as cloud in it
[01:04:21] uh that was so bad i read i think i i can't allow myself to say any more shit because i might
[01:04:29] tell you something even less funny than that uh so i think we are gonna wrap it up for today
[01:04:33] uh i guess the the takeaway is
[01:04:40] be really wealthy somehow yeah you're gonna want to come out of a rich nutsack you're definitely yeah
[01:04:46] definitely gonna want to get just like get money no don't get have already yeah that's the move if
[01:04:55] you haven't done that um oh no fucking mr show joke i think it's the the one uh with behind the music
[01:05:02] where he was like and he had dreams of one day finding a bag of money that's where i'm at i mean
[01:05:10] that's fucking that's a plot point in the sopranos uh tony blendetto finds a bag of money and ruins his
[01:05:16] life uh anyway that's all we just have the time to do fuck that's all the time for it goes i gotta
[01:05:24] get this out before i forget it was because you do it because you said it ruined his life
[01:05:29] i have just become very amused by the idea of like some guy and his friend getting exactly what
[01:05:38] his friend wants and it ruins his life and then he's trying to say monkey paw but he fucks up he's
[01:05:43] you got monkey pogged it is unfortunately been a it's not like good that it's in there but it
[01:05:52] it has been a main theme of unemployment monkey paw you got monkey pogged dude uh
[01:06:00] that's all the time we have for anime sickos i'm a top of anime sicko i'm joe an anime sicko
[01:06:04] this is a good i think this is one of the top this is definitely a top third episode uh
[01:06:12] bye bye bye bye thank you for listening to anime sickos i've been tom a sicko you can follow me on
[01:06:20] twitter at tom harrison 19 joe was also a sicko you can follow him on twitter at sharia uncle you can
[01:06:26] follow anime sickos on twitter at anime sickos or email us at anime sickos at gmail.com please leave
[01:06:33] us a review or something i don't know tell a friend anyway until next time bye
[01:06:39] bye