The Four Pillars

Anime Sickos (the podcast for geniuses) is about being crushed by the four pillars of modern misery: anime, gaming, posting, and jobs.

These four things are the only things you can do. All culture now is based on stupid brands and extended universes and esoteric lore: that’s anime. All hobbies are gaming. Any creative work shared on the internet is posting. And if you don’t have a job you die. If you can think of any activity not covered by one of these pillars, you’re actually wrong.



Horrible cartoons from Pervert Island, typically made from crushed bones of tired artists. These cartoons typically feature screaming teens with colorful auras or babes with jiggling jumbos. Tom and Joe have oatmeal brains and get earnestly surprised every time a teen uses their resolve to surpass a limit. Anime is the worst way to spend your time.



The thing that sucks about video games is that it is a hobby populated entirely by people who play video games. The dream of every gamer is streaming yourself gaming so people can gawk at you like a chimp that smokes cigarettes. Tom and Joe understand that modern games are shiny slot machines designed to steal your time. Unfortunately, they can’t stop because making numbers go up on a screen feels better than huffin’ spice. Gaming is the worst way to spend your time. 



Online is a huge toilet and everytime you post or look at posts, you slurp down a big glug of toilet water. “I will simply stop drinking toilet water,” you think. Good luck asshole, it’s insanely addictive. Tom and Joe have both tasted the ultimate posting goal: a viral joke, and both times it ruined their week. Posting is the worst way to spend your time. 



The life of a worker is the life of a cog. There is no such thing as a good job. If your labor improves the lives of your fellow humans, you for sure get paid starvation wages and will get laid off tomorrow. Meanwhile, all the good paying jobs involve making apps that teach police dogs to be more racist. Tom and Joe spend forty hours a week noisily licking boot so they can afford rent. Jobs are the worst way to spend your time.